I am experiencing an Alternate Universe week, where my Oncology Nursing job feels not so much like nursing, and my caregiver role for my father feels way too much like nursing.

Our Oncology Nurse Navigation team has been tasked with presenting a Survivorship Care Plan template to our IT support specialists. We have a plan in our computer charting system, but it needs to be updated and streamlined, with the goal of meeting national cancer accreditation standards, and presenting survivorship care plans to 100% of our breast cancer patients who were diagnosed in 2016 or after…
It’s a thing. A big, fucking, thing.

However, having recently been accused by my new manager of being a perfectionist, and having “extremely high” expectations of myself and others… I suppose it is, in a way, my cup of tea.

Meanwhile, there is my #eldercare role. This was from this morning:

Bob King Diaries; o2.23.2o17. 
Today is Bob’s son’s birthday. Also the anniversary of Bob’s son’s maternal grandmother’s death.
Historically, not always a great day for the Applegate-King people.
Round 2 with skin cancer lesion removal.
All handicapped parking spots at the clinic were full this morning. 
Bob appeared confused by directions to remove both overshirt and undershirt for suture removal on chest, and surgical procedure on his back.
Nurse Apple noticed that his pupils were unevenly dilated… wondering how things will go later in the afternoon, when she takes Bob in for an eye exam.
She stays in the room for the surgical prep; Bob looks to her each time the doctor or nurse asks him a direct question. It’s unclear if he is not hearing them, or not understanding their words.
He winces as the nurse places a cold grounding pad on his side. “This,” she explains, “is so you don’t get shocked when we cauterize the incision.”
“No,” Bob says, “I wouldn’t want that!”

I dashed down these words in a despondent haze of fever and cold medicine the other day:

I’ve seen it with public schools, and I’ve seen it with serious illness. 
We are not a marathon nation. 
People don’t like long term serious problems. 
Ask any person you know who has a serious chronic illness. 
Sure, the first few years, people will turn out in droves to support you and your cause… but then you just become a drag. “You’re still sick?”
And now that our public school system is very seriously threatened… parents are ferocious, true.
And many of them will surprisingly easily do whatever it takes for *their* child: screw the pack.
This is where fear turns truly dangerous: when neighbor starts to turn against neighbor.
Not many Americans appreciate the concept of “Greater Good.”

The surge of activism we are seeing is truly raw, genuine, and yes: exhilarating.
And in a terrifying time, we need that.
We need unity and voice and strength.

I hope I continue to be pleasantly surprised. I hope that #45 and his gang of Bible Thumping Thugs eventually hear our voices outside their offices and in the streets.
I hope that children and spouses and strangers and neighbors will continue to join together.
We, as a nation, are not trained for this. We are not prepared. Our public schools, our healthcare system. Like it or not, we are vulnerable.

These photos are my glimmer of hope. I look at them everyday.
I feel the love, and the strength.
#onward